


Spared

by sakechan4ya



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canonical Character Death, Dysfunctional Family, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Empathy, Family Angst, Family Dynamics, Family Feels, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Manipulative Relationship, Unresolved Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-31
Updated: 2015-08-31
Packaged: 2018-04-18 05:16:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4693451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sakechan4ya/pseuds/sakechan4ya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Young Levi a parent-less child, tittering on the brink of death life is spared from her clutches by the notorious man, Kenny the Ripper.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Spared

**Author's Note:**

> This is a rather long one-shot piece revolving around the events that transpired in Chapter 69: "Friends" of Attack on Titan. I also wrote a lengthy exposition regarding my own meta-analysis over both Levi and Kenny Ackerman featured in Chapter 2.

Spared

“Come back here, you little shit!”

Levi huffed throwing himself against the sodden wall. He grimaced. What was that awful smell?

“Hey you!”

Oh no! He stammered out of the trash pile. He ran down the dark alley. Dead end. He looked around. Levi didn’t see him? Where had the dirty, old man gone? Was he still behind him? He sucked in a deep breath, clutching the pouch.

“Boy!”

There he was. Levi sprinted out into the crowd.

“Hey kid watch where you are going!”

“Sorry.”

Levi hurried through the crowded marketplace. The blur of people and their voices faded as he ran. With all his might Levi made it through the marketplace. He folded over clutching his chest. It felt like his heart was going to burst. He peeked around the corner. Looked like it was clear. The old man was nowhere in sight. Great! He slipped the pouch inside his pocket. 

“I need to get back to mother.” Levi clambered through the sea of people unnoticed. He slipped inside the small crawlspace near the inn…

“Ouch!” Levi stopped clutching his bruised knee. Levi patted his pocket. That’s right he had a mission to complete.

“I need to get this to mother.”

He gritted his teeth ignoring the pain. Levi brushed it off, besides he’d become accustomed to random spurts of pain. This was nothing. The pit-patter of his hands and feet echoed inside his head as Levi trudged inside the small space. He stopped. What was this noise? Was it coming from behind him? He turned and nothing but darkness greeted his limited sight. Levi gasped. He placed his ear against the wall. Water! And from the sound of it, it was coming fast. But from which way? Levi wasn’t sure.

“Whoa!”

 Levi turned and behind him the rush of water was heading his way. Fast. What was this? This never happened before.

“I have to get out here.”

His tried to move, but his legs wouldn’t budge. Levi shut his eyes and with all his might he broke free. He pulled his leg out of the small crack. First his knee, and now his leg. He sighed. What else could go wrong? He glanced down at his pocket.

“Mother needs this.”

He forged on through the crawlspace. The sound of water filled his ears. He looked back. Oh no! The water was getting closer. Fighting both the panic and pain, Levi forced himself to go faster.

“There it is!” An unexpected speck of light illuminated his path.

Levi clambered through the hollow space. Down below him was freedom. But, this was a far jump from what he was used to. He looked back. Rather than succumb to drowning Levi jumped. Somehow Levi landed on his feet. Seems those relentless callouses provided the ideal cushion. He looked up. Levi gasped and dived to the ground. The rush of water from the crawlspace flooded the area. Levi huffed and leaned against the sodden wall. Wow! That was close. He stepped through the ajar door.

“Be with you in a second.”

Levi skirted inside the room across the hall. He peeked outside the door. It was only the dirty old inn-keeper. He stopped at the door across the way. Strange, what was he doing?

“That should flush out all those filthy rats.” He stepped inside. The old man slammed the door behind him.

Yielding to caution Levi stepped out of the room. “Mother, I’m coming.” He ran down the empty hall…

“Mother.”

He stopped dead in his tracks. He inched closer to the door. Piercing screams vibrated against his ear. Levi froze. What was going on? He moved away. Levi sunk against the wall. Who was it this time? What were they doing to his mother? They better not hurt her! Levi sighed. He buried his face inside his small hands. There was nothing Levi could do for his mother at this point. She didn’t like when he interrupted her time with her customers…

“Hey, watch out kid.”

“Huh?” The unfamiliar voice jarred the boy back to life.

He gathered to his feet. Levi wiped his damp face. The door was open. He peeped inside. Should he go in?

“You can come in.”

With her permission Levi stepped inside. He hesitated inside the doorway. Everything looked the same. Mother always tried her best to keep their room clean after the strangers left.

“You can come closer.”

Strange. Mother, looked so happy, but why? He didn’t understand why she was always had a smile on her face. He opened his mouth staring into her sunken, grey eyes. His voice-box refused to budge. His throat felt rather dry. He tried to swallow but it did nothing to help his parched throat. What was the matter with Levi? He paused. Where had all his excitement gone? He was here in his mother’s presence. So, why couldn’t be bring himself to say something to her.

“Honey, is everything okay?”

He nodded.

“You sure?”

Levi peered at his mother. This warm sensation coursed through his body jarring him from his stupor. There he was inside his mother’s embrace. Levi shut his eyes. He returned her embrace. Levi always felt safe inside his mother’s arms. Her touch released that anxiety that somehow paralyzed his voice.

“Look at you growing up to be such a handsome boy.” She doted over her son.

A small smile touched her lips. He flinched. A jolt raged through his small body. She continued stroking his thick hair. A mother’s touch so warm and loving putting all his pain at ease. She placed him inside her lap. He touched his pocket. That’s right he had something to give his mother.

He reached inside his pocket. “Mother, I got this for you.”

Her hollow eyes widen. “Honey…what is it?”

“The medicine.”

“The medicine?”

“You said you needed some to get better.”

She pressed him against her breasts. Why was she holding him so tight?

“Mother, you’re hurting me.”

“Levi, how did you get this? You didn’t steal this did you?”

He turned away from her callused glare. How dare she ask him such a question? He was only trying to help.

“I’m sorry.” Levi huffed crossing his arms. “I wanted to help you get better.”

“How I can be mad at you?” A smile graced her thin lips. “Thank you, Levi.”

“I don’t want you to get sick again.”

“Now, that I have this I promise I won’t.”

“You promise?”

She nodded. She took Levi’s small hands inside her own. The fragileness of her hands. Was mother okay? Her hands looked so pale and thin.

“Levi, my dear son. I promise you that someday we will leave this hell-hole I’m going to make a better life for the both of us.”

Levi leaned in his mother’s embrace. This promise of hope made his small heart dance with delight.

“Sit here.” She stood. His mother hobbled over to the small table.  

“Mother, are you going somewhere?”

“I came across this delightful little book.” She waved the book high in the air.

“Can you read it to me?”

“Of course!” With his spirits lifted Levi handed his mother his undivided attention. 

“Once upon a time, inside the royal capital of Mitras…”

* * *

  _A couple of days later_. 

* * *

 

“Mother!”

“Please take it,” Levi said. “Don’t sit up, that may hurt you.”

“Levi, I will be fine.”

“How can you say that?”

She reached over coddling his face. Levi flinched. Her hand were so cold. He pulled them away.

“My sweet Levi, I’m sorry that I’m not able to keep my promise to you.”

“What…?”

A long, sigh escaped her pale lips. What was going on with mother? Was she struggling to breathe again? Levi heaved. This wasn’t good. Why hasn’t mother gotten any better?

“Levi, my disease hasn’t gotten any better.”

“Why not I thought you took the medicine.”

“Honey, I did.”

“So why haven’t you got better?”

The strong thump inside his chest growing stronger.  Levi leaped from her bed. He grabbed the pouch from her nightstand.

“Take this!”

The loud plop against her bed drowned out the quaking of his rattled heart.

“Levi…please.”

“Please take it!” he said.

His resolve grew stronger with each breath. She lied back against the pillow. A wide smile graced her lips. Levi glared at his mother. What was she smiling for? How could she be so happy at a time like this?

“Mother!” Levi slammed his fist against the table.  

“Levi, sweetie I don’t have much time to left in this world.”

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t able to provide a better life for you.”

Levi swallowed hard. His small body he was no longer in control. He glanced down. His knees were shaking on their own. He toppled to the ground. Levi wrapped his head in his small hands. No there no time for this! Levi had to keep up his strength for his mother’s sake.

“Levi, listen to me for once in your life.”

“You have to live.”

He glared at his mother. What was that supposed to mean? He was alive, after-all. Why would she say such a thing? Wait, was she still there?

“Mother…”

“Levi, you will go on to do great things in your life. You will become such a strong man. Find a way to escape to the surface.”

“Mother…” 

“I will always love you.” She turned away.

Levi heaved. He tried to catch his fleeting breath as everything seem to spin in this daze. He clutched his head. He felt dizzy. Strange once the fog cleared everything around him spun sending Levi into this deep trance. Levi pressed himself against the wall. Had their room grown smaller? No that wasn’t it. Their room was caving in on him! He had to escape. Where was the door? Levi peeled himself away from the wall. He looked around. Levi scratched his head. Wait something was amiss.  

He shifted his gaze. Mother! Their fight over her medicine. Had she decided to take it? If she had why was she so quiet? Levi sauntered over to her bedside. He leaned in close. The swirl of cold air jarring his senses. He reached out touching her face. His fingers sinking inside her hollow cheeks. Levi looked over at her chest, buried underneath the covers. It didn’t move. There was no rise or fall. He crumpled to the floor. Levi dug his fingers in the cold, ground. A long wail escaped his lips. He felt the vibrations circulate through this small hands. He stood on his unsteady legs. A small smile touched his lips. She looked so peaceful like one of those carved statues from his book. Levi pulled the covers over her arms tucking her in. Nice and tight.

“Mother, doesn’t like the cold.” He wiped his face. “Don’t worry mother, I wouldn’t let you freeze.”

Levi turned away from his mother. He glared at the door.

“Olympia!”

The man pounded on the door.

“Olympia, your customer is here.”

“Are you there? I’m coming in.”

Oh no! Levi slid underneath her bed.

“What’s going on here?”

The footsteps gathered closer.

“Olympia?” The inn-keeper hovered near her bed.

“Where is that brat of yours?”

Levi scooted away from the edge of the bed. He covered his mouth in an effort to control his teeth’s constant rattling.

“Looks like disease got her too.”

“That’s too bad.” 

Levi looked up and he was gone. He sighed. Levi lied his head against the floor. Levi shut his eyes. The fog inside his head drowned out all other thoughts. Once the fog so did his mind. With a clear head Levi believed that perhaps this series of events was all part of some weird dream. That’s it. Mother, had warned him about eating those scraps and what they could do to him. This thought put Levi at ease. Now, all he needed to do was to wake up. Levi shut his eyes. Everything including his mother’s health would be in order once he awoke.

* * *

* * *

Time passed how many days Levi didn’t know and yet she remind asleep. She never moved since that day. He slid against the wall. Levi against his own will sank to the floor. The pain didn’t move him, neither did those flustering hunger pangs ravishing inside his belly. What he thought was a dream had become a nightmare. One he would never escape. Seems this was the end for the boy with those haunting grey eyes. The flicker of light inside was growing dimmer by the second. Tick…tick…tick…how much longer did Levi have left till death took him away? From the looks of things seemed Levi was her next victim. A fate Levi decided to accept without question if it meant he could stop this suffering and be with his beloved mother.

But, how could a child so young accept death so easy? Simple. Levi had nothing to live for. He had no friends or family. Levi groaned and covered his ears in an effort to drown out the constant churning inside his belly. He dropped his hands. It was no use. Frustrated, Levi dug his fingers into his hair. His head itched to no end. Levi gasped at the clumps of hair inside his small hands. Levi shut his eyes rocking back and forth.

“Please take me now.” Levi turned his attention over to the ceiling.

A long sigh escaped his raw throat. He felt so hollow inside. At this point, Levi could feel his life-force draining from his small body. This was it. Levi knew this was the end. Levi decided this was the moment he would surrender himself over to the darkness. Anything to escape this torturous pain. A smile touched his lips. Levi felt so light. This sense of peace washed over him.

“ _Don’t worry mother I will be joining you_.”

Noises filled his ears shucking him out of his stupor. Huh? Where were these sounds coming from? It was a strain but Levi managed to lift his head. What was that? It sounded like the door had opened. Could it be that death had come to take him away? Levi sunk against the wall. Great! Levi was ready for her to take him. Seconds pass. That’s strange was he still…alive? He sighed. How long was this going to take? Hadn’t he suffered enough? Levi froze. Were those footsteps? Could it be? Was someone in their room?

“Whoa.”

“Whoa.Whoa.”

“Whoa. Whoa.”

This voice was of this world. So Levi was still alive.  

“You seem to have lost a lot of weight Kuchel.”

“Kuchel...?”

His voice jarred Levi back to life. How did this man know his mother’s real name? Wait, couldn’t he see that she was dead? So why was he here? Was he one of her customers? Did he come here seeking proof that she was dead? He sighed. Stupid man. Another thought filled his head. Perhaps he should say something to acknowledge his relentless probing.  

“She’s dead.”

“And you?”

Levi looked up meeting his glare.

“You alive?”

Levi turned away. He wondered if this strange man could see death lingering over his head. Levi pursed his thin lips. A few moments ago he was almost swept up inside her embrace until he showed up. Damn this man and his intrusion!

“Whoa gimme a break.”

“You understand me right?”

“What’s your name?”

“Levi…”

“Just Levi.”

Why would someone need to know the name of someone who was the brink of death? Perhaps he needed it to mark his gravestone. Yes, that was it. 

A loud thud startled Levi. He shuddered his attention over to the strange man. He slid against the hollow wall.

“I see Kuchel.”

“Guess you’re right.”

A rush of fatigue swept through his body. Levi blinked everything around him slowly fading away. He struggled to keep his eyes from falling shut. With his remaining strength Levi leaned against the wall. He glared at the strange man. Why wouldn’t he go away and let him die?

“It’s not even worth telling me your name.”

Levi curled his fist. Where was death and why hadn’t she come for him yet? Levi shuttered his attention over to the ceiling. Then it him. His end was near.

“I’m Kenny.”

“Just Kenny.”

“I knew Kuchel.”

“Nice to meet you.”

Levi tried to turn to Kenny but it was too no avail. All his strength was gone. He shifted his thoughts. Levi wondered how he knew his mother. Levi couldn’t recall his mother ever mentioning a man by the name of Kenny. Besides, this man didn’t look like any of her regular customers. His thoughts stalled. Levi took in a long breath. He caught his head as it fell into hands.

“ _Yes, has death come for me? It’s about time_.”

“Hey kid?”

“You okay?”

Everything around Levi started to fade away. His eyes fell shut on their own. Levi surrendered to the darkness.

“ _Mother, I’ll be with you soon_.”

* * *

* * *

“Wow, kid you must’ve been really hungry.”

“When was the last time you ate?”

Levi looked up, mouth stuffed with food. Was he talking to him? For what. Whatever. He turned his attention back over to his meal. The sweet taste of food never seemed so good. He stuffed a large piece of bread inside his mouth. Levi couldn’t remember the last time he had a full belly.

“Kenny?”

“What?”

“How’s it going?”

“Fine.”

Levi looked up from his meal. It wasn’t a man he recognized. He continued to stuff his face.

“Did you hear…” the man trailed off.

“Hear what?”

The man stepped closer. Levi cuffed his hands around his food. No one was going to take this from him.

“Hey kid ain’t nobody going to take your food.”

“Kenny, is that brat your kid?”

“Hell no!”

“Is he with you?”

“Something like that?”

Levi threw the man a scornful gaze.

“The kid’s got quite a glare.”

“Sure he ain’t yours?”

“I’m sure.”

He scoffed. “I didn’t know you were in the business of taking care of street rats.”

“We got a couple running around the streets here.” He threw his head back in a fit of laughter.

Kenny sighed. “Not that I give a damn about what you think, but I’m not this kid’s parent, but I knew his mother.” Kenny turned to Levi. “She was kind of important to me.”

“What happened to her?”

“She’s dead,” Kenny said.  

“I suppose it’s better to take some in some of those filthy rats than letting them roam the streets. I’m tired of the little shits stealing from my store.”

“Did you ever stop to think that maybe the brats are stealing cause they ain’t got a choice.”

“Kenny, when did you become such a saint?”

“What the hell you blabbering about?”

“I’m trying to figure out who the hell, I’m talking too you ain’t talking like the Kenny Ripper, I know.”

“Whatever.”

“I suppose even vicious guys like you, need to take a break.”

“Yeah.”

“Do you know who this guy is?” The strange man stepped closer to their table. “Hey, kid you better be careful.”

Levi looked on. He continued to eat. What was old man talking about?

“Matthew?”

 “Looks like my old lady is calling.”

A thud echoed inside Levi’s head. Both the old man and Kenny turned their attention over to him.

“Kid you okay?” Kenny asked.

“So…full.” Levi rubbed his full belly.

The other man chuckled. “Kenny, gotta go so come by later so we can discuss your payment.”

“Yeah.”

“Kid?”

Ouch that hurt! Levi threw Kenny this callused glare.

He rubbed his arm.

“Get up.”

He tried but his legs felt heavy like some of those logs some of his mother’s suitors would bring inside their room. Kenny took a long sip of his drink. He stood to his feet.

“Didn’t I tell you to get up?”

“I can’t.”

“What you do mean you can’t?”

“My legs.”

With a quick ruffle of Kenny’s hand. Levi was thrust to his feet. He leaned against the table. His legs almost buckled underneath him.

“Kid, if you’re going to live with me when I tell you do something do it the first time. Got it?”

Levi nodded.

“Let’s go.”

Levi followed behind Kenny. Levi’s mind seem to float in this haze since Kenny’s arrival in his life. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed since. Levi didn’t know what day it was he’d lost track of everything since his mother’s death. Levi was spared from her clutches once again. As much as Levi longed for his mother he decided to use this opportunity to fulfil his mother’s dying wish.

“Hey kid!”

“Yes…?”

“Let’s go before I leave you here.”

“Coming.” Levi rushed out of the bar following behind Kenny.

* * *

* * *

Levi tighten his grip on the handle. He lunged forward swinging it high into the air. The whistle echoed inside his head. Take that! He stopped and shifted his attention to the ground. He threw on a frown. He glanced back and forth between his hand and the knife.  

“Good job kid.” Kenny delivered a swift pat of congratulations. “You’re a natural.”

Levi shrugged. He turned away scratching his head. Huh, what was Kenny talking about?

“Watch.” Kenny grabbed the knife. “Pretend, your target got you pinned the ground.” Kenny switched his grip on the knife.

What was he doing? That’s not the right way to hold a knife.

“Here’s the trick kid.”

“Carrying your blade this way gives you the advantage over your opponent.” Kenny slowly inched forward. Levi swallowed throwing his hands into the air. He backed away. Why was he pointing the knife at him?

Kenny stepped away from Levi. He folded up his arms in a huff.

“What?” Levi asked.

Levi looked down at his shirt aghast. He glanced back and forth Kenny and small hole in his shirt. But how? He didn’t see the knife move.

Kenny chuckled. “Hey, kid you gotta be quick or else your opponent going to get you.”

He took another swing. This time Levi darted out the knife’s treacherous path.

“You’re getting the hang of it.” Kenny handed him the knife. “Here, try it.”

Levi stumbled. That was close! Good thing he was able to find his balance. He sighed and glanced down at his feet.

“What’s wrong, kid?”

“Nothing.”

Kenny folded up his arms. He threw Levi this scornful glare. Must be his new shoes that caused those calluses to swell. Levi gritted his teeth ignoring the pain. He ran his fingers over the blade. Levi flinched the dim speck of sunlight that gleamed against the sharp edge was bright. So this was the key to protection and learning how to use this would teach Levi how to defend himself.

Levi switched the blade over to his right hand. He turned blade away from his body. Levi gasped. He watched the knife plummet to the ground. The loud thud echoed inside his head. What was this strange sensation that rocked throughout his small body? The sound of Kenny’s voice snapped Levi out of his stupor. With his unsteady hands he picked it up. Levi gripped the knife almost to the point where the blood flow ceased. Levi clenched his teeth. He unleashed a quick forward thrust. Levi lunged again swinging the knife in all directions. Take this! To hell with you all! Gruff laughter filled his ears. He turned stunned and there was Kenny with this twisted smile stretched across his face.

“You sure you never held a knife before kid?”

“Huh?”

“All that anger and rage, keep at that’s what’s going to keep you alive.”

Shocked raged through Levi. He stared at his small hands. Where had that surge in anger come from?

“Kenny?”

Levi gasped. He dived behind the large barrel.

“What the hell?” Kenny asked.

“Kenny what’s going on?”

“Not much.”

“Who’s that?”

“Who?”

“The kid?”

“What kid?”

“The one behind you?”

Kenny turned and pulled Levi out from behind him. Levi cowered next to him. He tried his best to keep his unsteady legs from collapsing beneath him.

“Hey someone told me, that saw you with some bushed-eyed brat.”

“And your point?”

“Hey…I know you!”

Levi swallowed hard. Oh no! He had hoped the old man wouldn’t recognize him.

“You’re the little shit that was always stealing from my shop.”

Damn! He was caught. What to do now. There was nowhere for Levi to go. Levi turned and meant Kenny’s hard gaze.

“Come here, you brat.”

“Let me go.” Levi panicked. The ground was no longer beneath him.

“You need to pay me back for all the shit you stole.”

“Please, let me go!”

“Hey let the kid go.”

“Hell no this punk owns me!”

“So what if he does.”

“I said put him down!” Kenny said.  

Levi struggled against his assailant. He paused his struggle and out of the out of the corner he saw Kenny coming closer with his fists curled. Levi gritted his teeth. The sting of his callused stare. He had to get away from this man, before Kenny punished him.

“Damn you!” Levi dug his fingers deeper into his flesh. “You’ll pay for that you little shit!”

“Put the boy down.”

“Come and make me…”   

Ouch! Levi plopped to the ground. He rubbed his backside. That hurt.

“Take note, kid.”

Levi glanced back and forth between both men.

“You’re going to pay for that!” the shop man said.

The man attempted to make the first strike. He swung and missed which gave Kenny the opening he needed. Everything happened in a blur from that moment on. A string of grunts and growls filled Levi’s head drowning out all his other thoughts. He grimaced and covered his ears.

“So how much does the kid owe you again?”

“Nothing.”

“You wanna repeat that.”

“Nothing…”

“Get out of here!”

The old man dropped to the ground. Levi’s eyes meant his in this distance gaze. Fear. Sheer terror stretched across the man’s brutally battered face. He lied there reaching out a bloody hand. Levi froze and so his entire body. Was this the horror Kenny was trying to teach him? Was this, this man’s way of surviving by instilling fear in anyone he felt was a threat?

“Hey kid?”

Levi looked up Kenny’s voice shucking him out his thoughts.

“That was your next two next lessons.”

“My what…?”

“Lesson one how to treat your neighbors and lesson two how to greet them.”

Levi cringed. His foot made this sicken thud sound as he approached. Levi gritted his teeth. Incredible. Kenny stepped on this man, as-if he were a piece of trash stuck to his shoe.

“Look, kid don’t look so shocked. You have to do whatever it takes to survive in this shit-hole.”

“Besides, only the strongest and most powerful survive.” He thrusts the knife at Levi. “If you want to become strong you know what you need to do.”

* * *

* * *

Levi slid against the tree. A rustle nearby startled him from his flustered thoughts.

Levi scowled. “It was only you, Uncle Kenny.” Levi tugged at his corpse. “My mother’s older brother.”

“You old bastard.” Levi shifted his gaze. That’s right. He had almost forgotten about the titan serum. Levi glanced back and forth between it and his corpse. He turned away. There it was again.  Levi shifted his thoughts focusing on Kenny’s voice.

_“They couldn’t keep going unless they were drunk on something.”_

_“They were all slaves to something even him.”_

“What were you drunk on Kenny? Were you becoming a slave to this…?” Levi held up the small black box. “Was this the power _you_ craved?”  

Levi froze he stared through Kenny. His voice filled his head once again.

“ _I can’t be someone’s parent_.”

Levi lunged forth grabbing his corpse.

“Dammit! If you couldn’t be someone’s parent why did you save me?”

“You could have left me to die. Then I could have been with my mother.”

Cruel bastard. Levi wrapped his head in his hands. “I saw you slip away that day.”

“Bastard, you left me and never returned.”

“I know you can’t hear me but that day you left, I decided I was the master of my own fate.”

“So from that moment on I never relied on anyone to take care of me.”

“But, it still hurt Kenny. It felt like I was…losing my mother all over again.”

Levi turned away from him. Dammit! Kenny! Why did things have to end this way? How had Kenny and Levi become mortal enemies? Kenny was the one who taught him how to survive in this cruel world. He never imagined this was how Kenny Ackerman would meet his end.

Levi sighed. “I suppose you can rest a bit easier now.”

“Must be great not having to look over your shoulders yielding to some bull-shit caution.”

“But, I wonder if you are truly at peace now since you weren’t able to obtain this power you craved.”

Levi stood and wiped his face.

“Disgusting.” He raised the box. “Please, give mother my regards.”

Levi trudged through the thick grassy knoll. He spotted his horse near one of the trees. Levi turned to him mounting his steed.

“Thanks Uncle Kenny.”

* * *

* * *

Levi tucked his hands inside. Good, it was still there. Safe and sound. He sighed turning his attention to the window. It was incredible, all these feeling swelling inside. He stood wondering, how he a man could feel so much sorrow and yet so empty inside? Levi didn’t know what to make of these incessant feelings of guilt and denial.

“Damn!” He slammed his fists against the window. “Curse you!”

“Levi…?”

He hesitated. The familiar voice shucked out of his internal thoughts. Levi swallowed hard. Had seen his outburst? The footsteps came closer. This quiet echo inside Levi’s head grew louder as he gathered closer drowning out all his other thoughts.

“Erwin.” Levi turned meeting his iron gaze.

“Levi, good work out there.”

“Thanks.”

“Zachly and the others have been a bit overzealous in their regards to Kenny’s remains.”

“I was only doing my job.”

“I commend you for all your effort. That man was extremely dangerous and it seem that his reputation continues to precede him even in death.”

Levi folded his arms. “What do you mean?”

“Once word got out that Kenny was dead, some former members of the interior military police brigade started declaring their undying allegiance.”

“Some even threatening to take revenge.” Erwin laughed. “I heard some even vowed to carry on his title.”

“Idiots.” Levi scoffed. “I suppose they forgot who’s in control now their empty threats mean nothing,” Levi said.

“Of course not, but we had to humor them to keep them from trying to stage…”

“A coup?” Levi said.  

Erwin stepped closer. “Yes, something like that.”

Levi sighed. “As if we need anymore more blood on our hands.” He glanced down at his own.

“It will probably take a lifetime to clean up the shit already smeared on them.” Levi turned away.

He curled his fists.

“ _You need to control your anger. Especially around Erwin. That bastard likes to probe_.”

“Levi…is everything okay?”

“You seem upset at something.”

Levi threw Erwin this scornful glare. Erwin didn’t flinch in fact he inched closer. Levi crossed his arms. Damn! What is with, Erwin today? Curse him and his relentless probing!

“What’s going on?” Erwin asked.

There was softness to his tone. Could Erwin be expressing genuine concern? Levi scoffed. He didn’t know the man was capable of such an emotion.

“I’m fine.”

“Something tells me otherwise.”

“Is that so?”

“Levi, we’ve been working together for years now so I think I know when you aren’t acting like yourself.”

“Is that right?” Levi stepped closer to his Commander closing the proximity between them. “You mean to tell me all this time, you still have a shred of humanity left inside that mangled body of yours?”

Erwin chuckled. “I suppose so.”

Levi gazed at his nub. “I guess getting your damn arm eaten has made you weak.”

“Weak…?”

“Don’t come at me with this bull-shit emotional crap.”

“We don’t have time to fester in that not with all this other stuff we have going on here.”

“Levi, since we had a few moments to spare, let's converse for a moment there is something I want to share.”

“What are blabbering about?”

“Do you know why I choose to make you Captain of my squad?”

“Is this supposed to be some stupid trick-ass question?”

What the hell was Erwin going on about this time? He needed to stop with all the riddles and get to the damn point.

“No trick question,” Erwin said.  

“I see. So did you do it to spite me?”

“So that each time we set foot outside these walls…I would be reminded of their deaths.”

Erwin smiled. Levi grimaced. So disgusting! What the hell did he find so funny?

“Levi, the truth is I like having you by my side, because you remind of the man I used to be.”

Levi froze. His blood ran ice cold the shiver trickled down his spine.

“I was once an ordinary man who lived a normal life, but that all changed when my father died.”

“Since that day I was hell-bent on destroying those people…who snatched away my life.” He pointed to the window.

Levi stepped back Erwin’s intoxicating scent jarred him out of his stupor.

“It wasn’t until I meant you and your friends that I realized there was more to life than seeking revenge.”

“I learned that life is meaningless unless you have others to share it with. That’s when it finally hit me. That’s how you guys were able to survive underground by sharing the pleasantries of life no matter how mundane with each other and that’s what made life worth living.”

 “Why me? After-all didn’t you have both Mike and Hanji.” Levi scoffed. Bastard thinks he has all the answers.

“You’re right. They are close to me, but for some reason you are the only person who provides me with that tiny shred of humanity.”

“Thank you.”

“Erwin…” Levi broke free of his iron gaze. “What did I tell you about sprouting that sentimental bull-shit?”

“Levi…” Erwin turned away.

“Erwin?”

“Yes…?”

“There’s something I want you to see.”

“What is it?”

Levi reached inside his coat pocket.

“What is this?”

“Open it.”

Erwin gasped. “Is this what I think it is?”

“Yeah titan serum.”

“Who and where did you get this?”

“Kenny gave it to me.”

“This is big! It may be exactly what we need to find out more about the titan shifters.”

“Yeah.”

“Levi…thank you. We’ll discuss this with the rest of the counsel after the ceremony.”

“Speaking of which. We better get going,” Levi said.  

Still with both his heart and mind anchored to the ground, Levi managed to pull himself over to the door.

Erwin stopped and turned to Levi.

“What’s the problem?” Levi asked.

Levi sighed. What the hell was he up now? They didn’t have time for this.

“What was Kenny to you?”

“What…?”

“He was someone close you wasn’t he?”

“Erwin…what the hell are you talking about?”

He shrugged. “Truth be told, most of the time I have no idea and I suppose this is one of those cases.”

Levi hurried through the door. He curled his fists. Damn Erwin and his persistent meddling.  

“Guys, hurry, the ceremony is starting.”

“Coming Hanji,” Erwin said.  

Levi looked up and he was gone.

* * *

 

“Levi let’s go.” Hanji shuffled next to him.

He turned away. The bright glare of sunlight skewed his view. A roar of voices filled his head drowning out all his other thoughts. He looked around. Had the entire town come out for the ceremony?

“Look it’s starting,” Hanji said.

Levi shifted his attention over to the stage.

“ **ALL HAIL QUEEN HISTORIA**!”

A deafening roar echoed inside Levi’s head. Historia turned bowing before Zachly, Erwin, Pixis and Nile. Historia turned her attention to the eager crowd below. Another wave of roars flooded his ears.

“Historia is really cute…” said Jean.

Levi turned to his side puzzled. He hadn’t realized his squad was nearby.

“Why, now that’s she’s been crowned as the queen you suddenly find her cute?” Eren said.

Armin, Sasha and Connie covered their mouths in hushed laughter.

“Hey I always thought Historia was…cute.” Jean turned to Mikasa. He threw her a devilish smile.

“Guys do you mind?” Mikasa said.

“Always ruining the fun…” Jean said.

“All the time,” Eren said.

“Ouch!” Eren cut his gaze over at Mikasa.

 He pursed his lips rubbing his bruised arm.

Levi turned away. “Kids....”

“What was that, Levi?”

“Mind your own business four-eyes.”

A small smile graced his lips. So this was what that sentimental stuff Erwin was talking about. Enjoying these pleasantries no matter how small with your close friends are what made life worth living. It was these moments that mattered the most. Levi gazed over at his young friends with a smile.

“Heh.”

“Thanks.”

“You guys.”


	2. Levi and Kenny Ackerman: Crutch of their past and Self-reliance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meta-analysis: Divulging into the events that transpired in the Aot Chapter 69. Mostly my own headcannon and analysis over Kenny Ackerman and Levi’s past. 
> 
> Words: 1750

This particular chapter focused on Kenny Ackerman during his younger days. The audience is given a glimpse into his past. A past included the beloved Levi. In the fan fiction, I thought it would interesting to present Levi’s point of view with him being such an essential character in the AoT universe in all. This chapter was quite significant in moving the narrative along. We are giving insight to Kenny Ackerman’s past and his motivations along with his involvement with Rod Reiss. I suspect that Levi is included in the flashback, to show that Kenny wasn’t the heartless and ruthless killer as he is portrayed. The man did harbor a certain degree of compassion. His compassion is what helped Levi survive. We are presented with the events that led Levi to coming into contact with Kenny. Interesting is that Kenny had never seen Levi prior to finding his sister deceased.

Kenny may have distanced himself from her, due to his business with the Reiss family or his apprehension over her keeping the baby. Seem quite a few years had passed since he saw her again. So perhaps in respect for his late sister and feeling a bit of guilt for trying to encourage her to abort her child, is likely why Kenny decided to help Levi. If Kenny only knew that all his skills and the survival tools he instilled within Levi, would later help him to become “ _humanity’s strongest opponent_.” But as we know there was no way for Kenny to know exactly how Levi would turn out. Kenny’s role in the Aot universe seem to be that of an anti-hero, he was neither here nor there to any particular side of the humanity’s struggle. He was a man that was only doing the bidding of others in order to keep both himself and the Ackerman family alive. On his deathbed Kenny realized that he too was no different from everyone else he loathed and that he too, was a slave to something.

Power.

His struggle for this power is what I believed lead to his death. But, unlike the others at least Kenny recognized the error of his ways. I think he realized even if he found this power he was seeking, it wouldn’t have led to happiness. Perhaps his spite for what the regime had done to his family is what fueled his ambition and led him to continue seeking this power he craved. Kenny knew he needed more than brute strength to take on the powerful opponents inside the regime.Their family was split apart and Kenny knew that the only way to take revenge was to attain power. This may be part of the reason why he agreed to do the Reiss’ dirty work. He saw it was as an end to a mean and possibly the only way to keeping his family alive and at the same time use them to obtain the power he craved. At the time their family were the rulers of the world, as he believed Uri was the most powerful person he knew.

So inside of Kenny’s convoluted mind the most important person was also the most powerful. If there was anyone that could help him achieve his mission it was the Reiss family. Both parties had something to gain from this exchange. Kenny using the Reiss family to gain power. While the Reiss family used him to infiltrate the regime slaughtering those that stood in their way of controlling society. The Reiss family were able to seize power from others and control their memories expect for the Ackerman family. What an incredible opportunity. The Reiss family are able to get one of the Ackerman’s on their side and use them to do their bidding, all the while they sit on asses keeping their hands cleans. No blood spilled on their hands. Certainly would seem like the Reiss’ received the better end of this scrupulous deal. I suppose the family or rather Rod couldn’t pass up such an incredibly sweet opportunity. Even so despite these rather shady circumstances which I’m sure Kenny was aware of decided to took a gamble and it paid off well in his favor. He was able to gain a prominent position within the Military Police Brigade through those convoluted connections with the Reiss family.

Kenny probably would’ve never had an affiliation with the Military Police or the government had he not escaped Uri Reiss’ clutches. Kenny narrowly escaped death if not for his quick wits. Let’s be honest as tough as Kenny is Uri Reiss could have crushed him to death, but Kenny being the quick, skillful thinker was able to talk his way out of death. Which I suspect isn’t his first time doing so. I surmise living underground for all his life he was always yielding towards caution constantly having to feign her off. The man knew how to maneuver his way through her grip.

It is interesting how Kenny was driven by his desire to keep their family alive, yet he tried convincing his sister to abort her child. Then again in another regard perhaps he believed her choice of lifetime was not one conducive to raising a child. He realized his own short-comings and didn’t have any offspring’s so we are led to believe. Nonetheless, he is thrusts into this role of pseudo parent for Levi. A role he throws away once he realized the monster he created and decided to let Levi be the ultimate master of his own fate. I suppose watching Levi fighting a fellow citizen, Kenny knew that Levi was doomed and that he no longer wanted to be responsible for any of the people he hurt, or bloodied. Kenny had enough blood on own his hands and had he kept raising Levi, he knew that there could was a chance for him to become a slave to power as he had.

This was something, Kenny was sure his sister would have never wanted for her son. Kuchel never desired for Levi to become a vile raging man like her brother. Kenny was a man who used violence to taut and intimidate fear into any and everyone who wronged him. Kenny mentioned something about his sister dying because she wasn’t able to become strong. She was mother, and I’m sure once she had Levi she probably tried her best to teach him that having power doesn’t make you man, but it was what you did in your life and having compassion for others is what made you real man. Had Kuchel lived, Levi would probably be a different man, who didn’t use violence as means to get what he desired. Of course, this set of events wouldn’t have led him to befriending Farlan or Isabel or becoming a member of the Survey Corps. Levi would have been simply a street thug, who like many others perished without ever known what it was like to experience life on the surface. Levi continues to carry this burden alongside him as he battles against both the titans and these demons from his past.

No one in the Survey Corps knows the truth of Levi’s past, besides Erwin, and Hanji and a few others but even so they don’t know everything. I suspect that if people found out his relationship with Kenny Ackerman and his past as a street thug perhaps he wouldn’t command as much respect. In another regard, Levi’s almost God-like strength lends itself to people fearing him and following his lead without question. Despite his harsh disposition Levi has shown the same compassion that Kenny showed him with his comrades.

Rather than become a slave to power Levi uses his skills to save lives rather than snuffing them out. We don’t know if Levi killed anyone while he was living underground. One of the later chapters of the series ( _Chapter 58_ ) showed that in a desperate situation Levi will take the necessary action to protect his comrades. He sliced a man in half, which shocked Connie, Sasha, and left Jean petrified. It was shocking to me too. Any doubt or fear Jean, and the others had for Levi, I’m sure escalated witnessing first-hand his adept strength outside of fighting the titans. Those instincts from his past came to life and Levi sprang into immediate action to save those close to him.

This brings to mind another point Petra made to Eren. He honestly thought Levi resented authority. But, Petra goes on to explain despite his demeanor Levi follows commands without question. Any reluctance on his part to fight authority I believe changed the moment Levi lost his friends, Farlan and Isabel. Levi’s decision to stand by Erwin’s side has helped him come to terms with his life and the choices he’s made. I don’t think his life had much meaning up until that point seeing how he had this strong resolve to kill Erwin despite the danger and uncertainty of their orders. Levi probably realized he was almost on the brink of becoming a slave to very same people that subjected him to that life filled with darkness and no hope of escaping the underground.

This notion is what set him apart from Kenny. Levi realized that instead of taking his aggression out of Erwin and the Survey Corps, he should redirect his spite towards the regime. I think Levi’s title as the strongest lies not so much in his ability to kill titans, _which it does_ but in another regard, most of which stems from his uncanny ability to keep a leveled head and being able to think quickly on his feet. Levi has every reason to hate the regime, the Reiss family, and the titans but he hasn’t allowed himself to become a slave to his title. He could throw and flaunt it around, but he doesn’t. He seems rather oblivious to it. Connie, Sasha, Mikasa and Jean witnessing him killing one of Kenny’s man does place Levi more so on that pedestal. Thus proving Levi not only has the skills to annihilate titans but he can eliminate people in the same fashion and won’t hesitate doing so but only when the circumstances lend themselves so.

That alone sets Levi apart. Levi is able to control himself and his anger redirecting back to those that are responsible for humanity living on the constant edge of extinction.  

It remind to be seen if more of Levi’s past will be revealed. With the discovery of Keith Shadis’ connection to Eren I doubt there will another glimpse into Levi’s past, unless it is used as plot device to advance the story. Then again, the titan serum that Kenny stole, he handed it over to Levi, rather than using it himself. Erwin in turn gave it to Levi believing since he was strongest among their ranks he should keep it in his possession. It begs the question what will Levi do with it? I hope there is never a moment where Levi is at a crossroads again or becomes desperate enough to the point where he debates if he should use the titan serum on himself.

Levi is man used to being in control I suspect that he has come to point in his life that he able to control his emotions and not let them get the better of him. I don’t suspect that Levi will use the titan serum on himself.  But in another regard, let’s hope that his empathy for others will not be his undoing. I personally would rather Levi go on to the after-life knowing that he died saving his comrades rather than becoming a slave to his own desires to eradicate those that have wronged him or his friends.


End file.
